Purgatory – english

-1-

As every Friday night, the friends sat in the „Roadhouse“. It was a beloved tradition from his studies that Dean did not want to do without. Over the years, most of the study colleagues had failed to do so, and other buddies and friends from elsewhere had joined them.

Sam, Charlie, Benny, Adam, Cole and Dean sat at the regular table today.

Jared Padalecki as Sam Winchester, Felicia Day as Charlie Bradbury, Jake Abel as Adam Milligan, Travis Aaron Wade as Cole Trenton

„Should it make me think that I’ve been the only woman in the round for months?“ asked Charlie amusedly.

Dean shook his head. „The round is on you Bradbury! You didn’t want to talk about it anymore!“

Charlie raised his hand for an order.

„What’s the order boys?“ asked Jo, who, as always, oversaw the regular table. „Five Kinky Queens!“ cried Charlie queer across the table.

„Oh hey Charlie, you’re there too!“ Jo nodded apologetically across the table. „I didn’t want to offend you!“

Charlie waved off. „Good. I’m used to not being noticed among the hot guys here!“ „How is your mother doing? Haven’t I seen her this week?“ asked Dean to Jo.

„She sits at the office and makes the billing. I would usually say, just say ‚hello‘, but today I’d rather not disturb her in your place!“ replied Jo. „By the way… were you out at Bobby’s again?“

Dean shook his head. „I hardly had time in the last few weeks. We’re just starting to make a new movie. I’m rarely at home before midnight, checking press appointments, checking locations, learning text with Benny and Crowley. I asked Bobby if he would like to come back to the “Roadhouse”. But he said he had to do with the renovation of the house, whatever he meant by it.“

The door to the roadhouse opened and Crowley proudly walked in. Under his arm he had several rolls of paper. He nodded to Jo, ordered an Irish coffee and headed straight to the regular table.

„Hello Boys and Girls!“ he greeted the group. He threw a hand kiss at Charlie.

Dean got up and reached out to him. „Hello Crowley. It’s nice that you were able to set it up. May I introduce my friends to you: this is Sam, my younger brother; Charlie, our software expert. She’s like a little sister to me, so fingers off! You already know Benny. Adam, also a younger brother and Cole, my comrade from Haiti in 2004. Folks, that’s Crowley. We’re shooting the new movie together right now.“

„Hello Crowley“ the choir roared amusedly.

„I brought the movie posters, as promised. I got 10 from the print shop. Do what you want with them.“ Crowley threw the bundle of paper rolls on the table.

„Show them to us Winchester!“ cried Cole.

Dean rolled out a poster.

Mark Sheppard as Crowley, Jensen Ackles as Dean Winchester, Ty Olssen as Benny Lafitte

Adam was amazed. „Is this after the book of the same name by Chuck Shurley? I would like to get to know the author. Will he be on set? Can you introduce me to him?“

Dean wobbled his head. „Hold on little lion! I can’t tell you. But I will try to do what I can. You’re a fan?“

„The writers‘ meeting is on Wednesday, Dean. You could take Adam with you.“ Sam interjected into the discussion. „There will be a reading with the author, a champagne reception, presentation of the actors, photo appointments. Charlie, Megan Masters will be there too! I have reserved enough tickets for all of us again.“

„Cool, thank you Sammy!“ Dean and Adam said in the chorus.

Cole shook his head. „Sorry guys, I’m out. Monday to Friday Drill training with the freshmen in the barracks. And i can’t steal from it on Wednesdays when I’m driving out of here.“

„Dito.“ cried Charlie. ‚I can’t get rid of wednesday either. We have a new boss and he drives us quite a lot. I will miss a really hot bride! So Sammy, next time set the dates for the weekend!“

„Yes, boss!“ laughed Sam. „The book presentation is in the evening, if you two think differently!“

-2-

Castiel closed the bookstore and turned around. It was already dark and the streets were almost deserted. He breathed deeply into the fresh night air. He looked up. It was a starry night. He enjoyed the sight for a moment, then headed home.

On his way home, he passed Harvelle’s Roadhouse. Time to time he made a stopover here to drink a whiskey for the evening. Today, however, he was not after it.

But then the door to the Roadhouse opened with a loud bang and a drunk man stumbled at Castiel’s feet. Castiel was terrified and made a move backwards.

„Sorry, man!“ came from the door. Castiel looked up and straight into a pair of beautiful green eyes. He tilted his head to the side. He did not know if and what to answer.

„I’m sorry. I didn’t want to scare you. But the funny guy there had forgotten his decency at home today. Come on, I’ll invite you for a drink!“ said the green eyes to Castiel. Castiel swallowed. He was actually looking forward to a cup of hot chocolate in front of his TV. But somehow he couldn’t say ’no‘ to these haunting green eyes. He nodded and followed the green eyes inside.

At the bar stood Jo, who greeted him warmly. „Hey Castiel, how’s it going?“

„Good, thank you Miss Joanna,“ the bookseller replied, and followed Dean to the regular table.

„What did you call her? Joanna?“ asked Dean.

„Yes, why?“ Castiel quipped.

Dean shook his head. „Unimportant.“

When they arrived at the table, Castiel greeted everyone politely and took a seat. To his friends, Dean said: „I just threw a drunkard at the pretty guy’s feet and scared him. I owe him an apology.“ Addressed to Castiel: „What do you drink, buddy?“. Jo had followed them to the table.

„A whiskey, please,“ Castiel replied, bashful nodding to Jo. „And no, you owe me nothing. I…“ Dean raised his hand to interrupt him. He took a chair from the neighboring table and sat next to Castiel. He reached out to him. „Hi, I’m Dean,“ Castiel looked thoughtfully at his hand. However, he got in time and struck. „Castiel,“ he replied succinctly.

Dean nodded. „Welcome to the round!“ Castiel smiled. „Thank you.“ Dean didn’t push him any further and talked to his friends. Jo brought the whiskey. Castiel gratefully accepted the glass and emptied it in a drauhgt.

Jo and Dean laughed. „Another one?“ Castiel shook his head. „A water would be nice.“

„Seven Kinky Queens“ roared Charlie from the other end of the table. „And a coffee for me!“ dean continued. Jo nodded and looked around. „What else?“ Everyone was shaking their heads.

Dean looked at the man next to him. He seemed vaguely familiar. He just didn’t know where to come from. Dean didn’t want to ask him about it. It would have felt like a „shame on him.“ Perhaps later there was an opportunity to find out about the man next to him. 

Castiel seemed a little intimidated in the round. When Jo brought the glasses with the „Kinky Queen“, Dean discreetly ordered a whole bottle of it to the table. Jo nodded narrowly and disappeared again.

„Too bad that Jo has to work today, otherwise she could sit down with us like in the old days and have a bit of fun!“  Charlie said. Everyone was humming in agreement.

Charlie lifted her glass. „On our two new members. Crowley, Castiel, welcome to the club!“ Castiel got very hot. He felt that his face was shining with blush. He didn’t like being the center of attention and now he was sitting here with completely strangers and drinking. It was unusual for him and it was embarrassing for him.

Dean patted him on the shoulder encouragingly. „On Castiel and Crowley“ he intoned. Everyone rose and proclaimed. The resulting unrest caused Castiel to calm down a little.

When calm returned, Dean picked up the bottle of Kinky Queen and refilled Castiel’s glass. He prosed him. „To new friends!“ and emptied his glass in a draught. Castiel did the same. Dean repeated it a few times. Each time with the request to Castiel to follow his example.

Castiel slowly thawed a little. He looked into the round and, for the first time, really noticed that he was sitting at the regular table. He usually sat at Miss Joanna’s bar and looked over to the regular table every now and then. He had noticed this group two or three times. However, he did not elaborate on the individuals. Only the man next to him, with the green eyes and the freckles, had been remembered when Dean stood at the bar a few weeks ago to pay and smiled politely at Castiel.

He looked at Dean and wondered once again how he had landed at that table. Dean refilled Castiel’s glass. „Say, are you trying to drink me under the table?“ he asked with a laugh. Dean grinned mischievously at him. „And if it were?“ Castiel took a deep breath, put his head slightly obliquely and grinned appreciatively.

„My father always told me ’never drink with strangers‘. I think I know why now,“ Castiel laughed. Dean liked the warmth in Castiel’s deep voice, the warmth in his laughter… He shook his head, he did not want to pursue these thoughts.

Castiel noted that he was sitting at a table today with one of his favorite actors: Benny Lafitte. Gradually, he settled into a few smaller conversations and answered a few questions here and there.

He felt a little less uncomfortable. He let his gaze wander through the round and actually found the illustrious group nice.

Dean rehearsed Castiel. This time he looked him directly in the eye and smiled. Castiel noticed that the green eyes were covered with golden-brown speckles and did not notice that he was staring at Dean.

Dean, for his part, noticed that two sky-blue eyes were staring at him. He felt the redness rise in his face. He had noticed these eyes before. He could remember that sometimes there was a guy sitting at the bar, whom he found somehow sweet and hot and who had bright blue eyes.

„Now I know!“ he said suddenly. Castiel made big eyes. „What?“

„Where, I know you. You sometimes sit at the bar in front of Jo. I would never forget those eyes!“ Dean became aware of what he had said when the words had left his mouth. He ran red like a tomato, interrupted eye contact and tipped his shot down.

Castiel smiled. Dean had noticed him before. He felt, yes, how? He didn’t know. Got noticed, flattering, probably something like that, he thought to himself.

Dean fingered around in the inside pocket of his jacket and pulled out a business card. He put them on the table and pushed them over to Castiel with a newly filled shot glass. „We meet here every Friday. I’d love to have you back next week.‘

Castiel wanted to pull out the business card under the glass, touching Dean’s hand, which had left it on the card. Dean went through a pleasant tingling and he pulled his hand away in surprise. He felt like he was running red again and was helplessly reaching for his shot glass.

He tipped the shot down and when he slammed the glass on the table, there was another business card. He looked first at the map, then at Castiel.

Dean Winchester Phone: 785 – 8355583

Bookstore Seraphim Phone. 785 / 888 55 36   Castiel Seraph

„You own the bookstore at the corner of the road?“ asked Dean, astonished.

Castiel nodded. „I’d love to be back next Friday,“ he said. Then he rose. „Excuse me, but I have to slowly go home. I’m really tired and more than just drunk. In this state, I am not a good company for anyone.“

Dean laughed. „With us you are in a very good company! And you don’t have to apologize for anything here. When you’re tired, everyone can understand that. So then until Friday?“

Castiel nodded. He knocked on the table. „Until next time!“ and disappeared. Dean called after him. „Write to me if you have arrived safely at home. Otherwise, I’m worried. Not that someone throws a drunkard at your feet on the way!“

Castiel smiled inside himself: Dean was worried about him arriving home safely. He sighed. Dean looked after him thoughtfully. Maybe he should have brought him home? However, it wasn’t long before his phone vibrated.

Castiel would have liked to write more but was really too tired. He didn’t remember anything meaningful. So he left it at that. He took off his shoes and jacket and went straight to the bedroom, where he got rid of his other belongings. He dropped on his bed. He could also shower tomorrow morning. He was just too tired for everything. He set the alarm clock at 8 a.m., dropped his phone next to him on the bed, and immediately fell asleep.

Dean was reassured and put his phone back in his jacket. The friends were still sitting in the Roadhouse until well after midnight. Dean later fell into his bed drunk and happy. He dreamed of a pair of sky-blue eyes.

-3-

Dean woke up with a headache. He had a mighty hangover. ‚The sun was shining particularly loud today!‘ he thought.

The first thing he could remember from the previous evening was a pair of sky-blue eyes. He groped his hand on his bedside table until he found his phone. He wanted to make sure it wasn’t just a dream. In fact, there was his number and a chat with Castiel. Dean took a deep breath. Not a dream. He opened the gallery of his mobile phone. Here, too, there were photos of him. He hadn’t dreamed.

Dean had slept in his belongings. He sat down in bed and searched in his jacket. In fact, he had a business card from the bookstore Seraphim. ‚Oh my God,‘ Dean screamed inside. Oh, the headaches went stronger than before. Dean got up cautiously and staggered precariously into the kitchen. He crawled in the medicine cabinet for the headache pills. When he found one, he tipped the pills down with a glass of water.

He then went to the bathroom. He undressed and posed in the shower. Dean closed his eyes and let the water run over his head, face and back. In front of his mind’s  eye he saw Castiel’s face. A shiver ran through his body. He shook. Dean set the water from warm to cold, which achieved the desired effect. He calmed down.

After showering, he tied a towel around his hip and went to cook coffee in the kitchen. He had to get rid of the hangover. The headaches slowly subsided. After the first coffee, Dean indulged in a second and a third. Gradually, he became awake and clear in his head. His phone vibrated.

Dean had an idea. He would visit Castiel in the bookstore. He stood in front of his closet and thought about how to impress Castiel. Why did this thought come to him? He frowned. When had he ever thought about something like this? Hm. He shook his head. He opted for something leger.

Dean got two coffees and went to the bookstore. However, he had already drunk his coffee empty when he arrived at the bookstore. It was just before noon. He waited outside the store, leaning against a house wall, when Castiel closed the shop and wanted to leave.

„Hey blue-eyed hotty, coffee pleasing?“ flirted Dean. Castiel’s heartbeat rised. Dean was waiting for him outside the store… with a coffee?

„Hey green-eye,“ he replied, shy. Dean held the coffee to him. Castiel took the cup from him. „Thank you.“

Dean pushed himself off the wall of the house. „When you wrote earlier that you were working today, I was kind of sorry to have harassed you yesterday. I thought a coffee would be a good excuse.“

Castiel smiled and tilted his head to the side. „Harassed? It was a nice evening, you don’t have to apologize for anything.“

„A nice evening, yes?“ asked Dean mischievously.

Castiel did not respond. „Let’s go a bit.“ He ran off. Dean hesitated briefly and then followed him. They walked silently next to each other for a while. „If you still have a bit of time, maybe we could sit down in a cafe and talk a little bit?“ he asked Dean. He nodded. „Clearly, gladly.“

Castiel walked along a few little side streets until they came to a small cozy café. He pointed to it. „Gabriel’s Angelic Pie“. Dean nodded. „It belongs to my brother. He makes the best cherry pie in town!“ reported Castiel proudly.

They entered the café. „Hey Bro! What a rare honor!“ Gabriel stormed towards Castiel and pulled him into a hug. „Gabe, that’s mine…“ Castiel pondered. Dean looked at him and raised an eyebrow with a grin. “That’s my friend Dean. Dean, that’s my brother Gabriel.“ Dean reached out to Gabriel.

„Dean Winchester! In my bakery. It is an honor for me. Please take a seat.“ Gabriel pointed to one of the tables. „What can I bring you?“

Dean shrugged. „What does the boss recommend?“

Gabriel laughed. „Latte Macchiato and Cherry Pie!“ He made an expansive gesture with his hands to alert Dean to the display.

Dean nodded. „Sounds tempting. Let’s take it.“ He looked at Castiel to make sure he didn’t want anything else. Castiel nodded. When Gabriel disappeared into the kitchen, Dean turned to Castiel. „I’m glad you see me as a friend. We only know each other since yesterday, but I also feel that this is becoming a wonderful friendship.“ He winked.

Castiel smiled. „Are you flirting with me?“

Dean’s cheeks turned red. „Um.“

„Well, I just wanted to embarrass you. Now you’re not so pale in your face!“ Castiel laughed.

Dean pulled his forehead, but then had to laugh heartily.

Castiel ran it down the back hot and cold. This laughter, was so wonderful, so joyful and contagious. He laughed aloud now.

Gabriel looked at the two men from afar and smiled. He looked at his otherwise serious brother from the distance, who seemed eternally sad, he haven’t seen him so lucky for a long time . He brought the latte and cake to the table. „Let it taste you. That’s on the house!“

„Hm, I can’t accept that,“ insisted Dean. Gabriel put a hand on his shoulder. „My brother’s friends are also my friends. No rebuttals!“

„But…“ Dean tried again. Castiel put his hand on his forearm. “That’s fine. After all, you paid for me last night without being asked!“ Dean looked at his hand on his forearm. It was a strangely familiar feeling, a sense of connectedness. Without thinking about it, he placed his free hand on Castiel’s and looked him in the eye. „Okay. You won.“ He smiled.

This time it was Castiel who blushed. Dean giggled mischievously. As a result, both men had to laugh again.

-4-

Gabriel gave Dean his business card. „You can call me at any time. Whats app and Twitter I have too.“

Gabriel’s Angelic Pie Orders: 785 – 555 36 57 Private: 785 – 555 36 77

„Thank you.“ Dean picked up the card and immediately entered the private number into his phone. He looked up from his phone and Castiel in the face. He frowned. „Jealous? I know this view!“

Castiel swallowed his coffee and had to cough. „I’m sorry! I didn’t want that!“ Dean immediately swore, gently patting Castiel on the back. Castiel had started turning dark-red. Whether from a cough or from shame, Dean couldn’t say. Gabriel stood beside him and smiled. He probably thought his part?!

After the third piece of cherry cake, Castiel was finally able to convince Dean to leave. The two said goodbye to Gabriel warmly and promised to come back soon. Dean gave Gabriel his business card. „If you both feel like it, so you and your pretty brother here, …“ Dean put an arm around Castiel’s shoulder. „… can come to the screening of my new film on Wednesday. It’s a book reading, a champagne reception, photographers are there too. I’ll give Cas the cards.“ He patted him on the shoulder and pulled his arm back to shake Gabriel’s hand.

„I don’t know what about Cassie, but I like to come,“ Gabriel replied. Cas nodded affirmatively. Dean rejoiced and smiled.

Dean immediately apologized before the pastry shop. „I’m really sorry. I didn’t want to embarrass you in front of your brother. I just didn’t think about what I was saying.‘

Castiel shook his head. “You don’t have to apologize. It’s all right.” The two walked side by side. „So you’re shooting a new movie right now? What’s the title?“ Castiel just walked towards his apartment. „Yes, It’s ‚Purgatory‘. According to the book of the same name by Chuck Shurley.“ Castiel stopped. He looked at Dean thoughtfully. Dean also stopped and turned around. „What’s going on?“

Castiel smiled. „Chuck Shurley is my father.“ Dean kept his mouth open. „And the book reading on Wednesday takes place in my shop.“

Dean exhaled heavily. „I have to digest this first. That’s amazing!“ They kept walking. He rejoiced.

Dean looked at Castiel from the side. He liked the idea that Castiel would be there on Wednesday. But since when did a man trigger such feelings with Dean? Castiel was the first and only one. Dean was still wondering when Castiel stopped again. „What is?“ he asked.

„This is where I live.“ Castiel pointed to the front door. „Oh,“ Dean said. Both men stood diffident and remained silent.

„I’ll go and let you enjoy your weekend,“ Dean began cautiously. „Yes. Um. Thanks for the nice afternoon, Dean. I was really pleased. I didn’t have that much fun for a long time!“ replied Castiel. „You called me Cas earlier…“ began Castiel.

Dean immediately interrupted him. „I’m sorry. Don’t you like it?“ Castiel shook his head. „Dean, stop apologizing all the time. I like ‚Cas‘.“ He reached out to Dean to salute.

Dean, however, put his hand on Castiel’s cheek and looked at him. The skin under his hand was soft and warm and slowly turned red. Castiel’s beard stubble scratched a little in his palm. Dean smiled. „I write to you when I’m at home.“ He stroked his thumb over Castiel’s cheek and carefully pulled his hand away. He didn’t wait for the other’s response and turned around. Dean went without another word.

He did not recognize himself. What had he done? Why did he behave like that in this man’s presence? He turned around again and found that Castiel was still standing stiffly in the same spot and staring down.

Before Castiel had correctly understood that Dean was leaving, he had already disappeared around the next corner of the house. Castiel stared at him. He stood motionless on his doorstep for a while and tried to breathe. In and out, In and out… What had just happened?

Slowly, Castiel turned around and opened his door. He closed it behind him and leaned against it. Why did he react so much to this man? He didn’t want to think about it now. He took off his jacket and shoes and dropped on his couch. He reached for the remote control for the TV and turned it on. A report was being made on the state’s recent military actions abroad. His brother Michael was on display, a now highly decorated veteran. Castiel smiled. Some things never changed. He just didn’t want to report it. He switched to the next channel.

A mistake, as it turned out right away. The series „Supernatural“ with Dean Winchester in one of the two leading roles was just running there. Castiel sat in front of the TV with his mouth open. He had just sat with this man for three hours in his brother’s café and ate cherry pie. He shook his head and turned off the TV. His phone vibrated.

Castiel had to laugh. It was really a stupid photo. He didn’t like it. But it was kind of funny again. It was so DEAN. He dropped his phone on the couch. He didn’t want to think about whether Dean had a place in his heart after just two days, why, how much and where. He didn’t want to…

Castiel fell asleep on the couch and dreamed of green eyes, freckles and cherry pie.

Dean dialed Cas’s number. It rang.

„Hi Dean,“ Cas said. The sonorous bass caused Dean goosebumps.

„Hey Cas,“ he replied. „I, em, is everything okay between us?“

Castiel took a deep breath. „Dean, I’m sorry that I didn’t even say ‚Goodbye‘ sensibly and I’m sorry you disappeared so quickly and…  I don’t know what’s wrong with me right now.“

„Cas, you really don’t have to feel sorry! I actually call because I wanted to ask if…, well, can we meet tomorrow?“ Dean started sweating.

„Me, oh God, uh, I’d love to see you again. Yes.“ Castiel just stammered. He just felt so stupid.

„Hey, on the phone you can say Dean to me,“ Dean quiped. He could literally hear Cas’s brain trying to process what he heard. And then… Roaring laughter at the other end.

„Well, wait, if I get my hands on you tomorrow, then…“ cursed Cas.

Dean laughed. „What then? Hm, Cas? Are you punishing me then?“

Cas took a deep breath. „Oh, man. You’re just getting something of ambiguous!“

„Pfui, Cas. But these are your thoughts now!“ continued Dean. Castiel had to laugh. Dean loved it when Castiel laughed. Wait, what? Dean immediately interrupted that thought process.

„Well, I’ll get you off at 10 a.m. and we’re going to get out by car, into nature, ok?“ stuttered Dean.

„Yes, all right. 10:00 a.m. tomorrow, car, nature. Sounds great. I’m looking forward to tomorrow,“ Castiel said.

Dean took a deep breath. „Okay, then… until tomorrow, Cas. I’m also happy.“

Then he gave up. He had to process the phone call first. He would see Cas again tomorrow. And he was really looking forward to it. Had he actually made an appointment? Did it feel serious about dating? Dean shook his head. Where had he maneuvered himself into?

-5-

Dean shudded out of a nightmare. He was sweating and wheezing. No, couldn’t it be? He searched for his mobile phone and found it on the floor next to the bed. He scrolled through his messages and found Cas. 10:22 p.m. the last message. Should he call and make sure? Oh, they met today anyway. He just had to wait a little bit.

After two cups of coffee, he felt a little better. He packed a cooler bag of drinks and grabbed a few packets of crisps from the kitchen.

He showered, dressed up and packed things into the car.

Just in time for 10 a.m., he stood in front of Cas’s house. He was excited.

The door opened and Castiel stood opposite him. Dean grinned all over his face. Seeing him now in front of him reassured him immensely. „Hey Cas.“

Castiel presented Dean with a picnic basket. „Hi Dean! I made us some sandwiches and coffee.“ Dean picked up the basket and stowed it in the trunk next to his cooler bag.

He held Cas’s passenger door open. Cas thanked and stepped in. Dean ran around the car and took a seat in the driver’s seat.

„I thought we were going out to the countryside a little bit to escape the hustle and bustle of the city. I hope you like the idea,“ he tried himself in Smalltalk.

Cas smiled. „I really like the idea, Dean. May I turn on the radio?“

„Yes, of course. But it only works the cassette at the moment,“ Dean said.

Cas turned on the radio. AC/DC roared towards him. Yes, that suited Dean, Cas thought. He looked at the other man from the side. Dean seemed restless and tired. „How did you sleep last night?“ he asked him.

Dean pulled a snout and shook his head. „Not good. I had a nightmare and couldn’t fall asleep after that.“

„Oh, I’m sorry to hear. Do you want to talk about it?“ he quipped.

Dean shook his head. „Maybe another time. I don’t want to spoil the day with gloomy thoughts.“

They didn’t speak for a while until Dean veered into a parking lot. „Here we can leave the car and run a little bit.“ Cas and Dean got out of the car. Cas took the picnic basket and Dean took the cooler bag. He left the chips in the car. I was looking forward to Cas’s sandwiches.

They didn’t run long until they came to a resting place for hikers. There they sat down on a bench and unpacked the food. Dean took a big bite from his sandwich and moaned with delight. Even before he had swallowed it completely, he said to Cas, „That’s the best sandwich ever!“ Cas was embarrassed. „Thank you.“ After Dean almost looped down the sandwich, he drank Cas’s coffee.

Dean leaned forward and gave Cas a kiss on the cheek. „Thank you.“ Cas blushed and turned to Dean. „What was it for?“

„For the coffee and the sandwich.“ Cas looked Dean in the eye. „You’re welcome.“ He tilted his head to the side and explored Dean’s face. „Do you want to talk about your dream?“

Dean looked at Cas in surprise. „Yes, why not.“

He told Cas about his dream, that he had seen Cas die. At least he remembered that very clearly. He buried his face in his hands.

Cas carefully touched his hands and pulled them away from his face. „Dean – to talk about it sometimes helps. Maybe the dream will not come back. And you see me sitting alive and healthy beside you!“ He still held Dean’s hands and stroked his thumbs over to calm Dean.

Dean carefully pulled his hands away and looked Cas in the face. Cas smiled and Dean felt comfortable. He took Cas’s face into his hands and drew him closer to him. He waited to see if Cas said ’no‘ or pulled his head back. Cas looked him in the eyes and Dean felt he could look to the bottom of his soul. He tentatively pressed his mouth on Cas’s lips. He tenderly stroked his lips over the other’s. Cas relaxed and replied the kiss. He opened his lips and Dean penetrated his mouth with his tongue. Cas’s hand first lay on Dean’s hip and then wandered to Dean’s back, up there, over his neck and lingering at the back of his head.

They sat silently on the bench for a while, enjoying the sun in their faces.

After the picnic, they drove back to the city. Dean stopped outside Castiel’s house. The front door opened and two figures came running out. Castiel had barely got out, and he was holding a young woman and a young man in his arms.

Dean slowly got out and watched the three of them across the roof of the car. Castiel broke away from the two and turned to Dean. „Dean, these are my children, Claire and Jack. Guys, that’s my friend Dean.“

„Hey Kiddos.“ Dean raised a hand to greet them and walked to the trunk. The young people greeted back. Dean gave Castiel the picnic basket. He was unsure what to do with the information that Castiel had two almost grown-up children.

„I’ll go home. Write to me if you have a bit of air.“ Dean turned to go. Castiel held him by the shoulder. He looked Dean in the eye. „Thank you for the beautiful day.“ He gave Dean a tender kiss. Dean automatically put his hand on Castiel’s cheek and answered the kiss. „It was very nice, thank you.“ Dean got into the car and drove off.

Castiel turned to his house. In the door was Amara, his father’s sister. „I’m sorry, Cas! They just stormed out of the house,“ she apologized.

Castiel waved off. „It doesn’t matter. Why are you already there? You didn’t want to be here until tonight?“ Amara nodded. „I didn’t have to work today, so we were able to leave earlier.“

-6-

Arriving in front of his house, Dean parked the car in the garage and emptied the trunk. He carelessly put everything in the kitchen and took a beer from the fridge. Then he went into the living room and dropped on the couch. On the table in front of it was his laptop.

Dean opened the laptop and entered the name Castiel Seraph into the search engine.

Castiel Seraph

Castiel Seraph (b. Castiel Thursday Shurley) was born on 20.08.1974 in Boston, Massachusetts.

He attended Greenfield School, Northfield  School, and  the University of  Chicago, where he studied social theory.  

He is a published poet. His poems, including „Baby Pants“ and „Old Bones,“ can be found in the 2008 edition of the Columbia Poetry Review. He also co-wrote a cookbook.

He is co-founder and CEO of a non-profit organization dedicated to financing and supervising social projects at home and abroad.  

He was awarded the title of Lord by the Queen of England in 2008 for his outstanding voluntary work on British soil.

His films included. Loot, where he worked as an associate producer.  

Other movies (short films):

2013 Just Relax (author, production and direction)

2014 Suspicious Bulge (author, production, direction)

2015 It is Ticking (production, director, author)

Castiel Shurley took over the prestigious Bookstore Seraphim from his parents in 2010 and changed the surname from Shurley to Seraph.

His parents, Chuck and Becky Shurley, continue to work as a pair of writers.

Castiel Shurley married Amelia Novak in 1996. Their daughter Claire was born in 1997. Amelia died in a car accident just a year later.

In 1999, Shurley married his second wife, Kelly Kline, who gave birth to a son, Jack in 2000. This happiness should not last long either. Kelly succumbed to a serious cancer in 2005.

After some happyless affairs, including with actress Megan Masters, he finally outed as bisexual in 2015.

Here, too, the renowned bookseller can look back on some diverting affairs. This includes actor Crowley McLeod.

Dean found more information on the Internet than Castiel was willing to reveal even during their conversations. Dean, however, had to credit him for not actually having known each other for three days and that he hadn’t told much about himself.

Dean went to the search engine called Castiel Seraph.

Matt Cohen as Michael und Rob Benedict as Chuck

Now Dean had an approximate idea of Castiel. And he once again found that the Internet really doesn’t forget anything. He had not known anything about the affairs with Megan and Crowley, nor had anyone told him about them. He didn’t feel like Crowley and Castiel already knew each other at the regular table on Friday. But he hadn’t paid attention either.

After a second bottle of beer, Dean took a shower. If he was honest, he now knew more than he actually wanted to know. But that could not be changed now.

-7-

It left Cas with no peace that Dean made a very disturbed impression as he drove home after the picnic. When Amara and the children had gone to sleep, he called Dean.

D:        „Hey Cas.“

C:         „Hello Dean.“

D:        „What’s up?“

C:         „I wanted to thank you for the nice day today.“

D:        „You already have.“

C:         „Yes. But I thought, well. Maybe we can chat a little bit, you

know, about us.“

D:        „About us?“

C:         „Well, what’s next.“

D:        „I don’t know Cas, tell me.“

C:         „I would like to see you again. But tomorrow is Monday and the

Work week starts again. So I don’t know how we can do it or

should.“

D:        „Cas, give me some time, yes?! I have to deal with my feelings first. I’ve never had a relationship with a man. I have no idea what to do next.“

C:         „I can understand that. Are you afraid?“

D:        „No. Not because of it. It’s just new, you understand my first time?“

C:         „You can have as much time as you want. May I see you again anyway?“

D:        „See you Wednesday for the reading. After that there is a champagne reception. There can we talk.‘

C:         „All right. I’m looking forward to Wednesday.“

D:        „Cas, I was on Wiki and I read a bit about you.“

C:         „And? Disappointed?“

D:        „No. I’m sorry about that with your wives. And that with Crowley, well, I would have liked to know beforehand, but it doesn’t matter.“

C:         „Ok. I just have wiki open and oh man! If you have any questions, ask!““

D:        „Megan? She also plays on ‚Purgatory‘. She’s there on Wednesday.‘

C:         „Yes, two of my ex-friends will be there on Wednesday. Is that a problem for you?“

D:        „No. I just wanted to suggest that you can read my wiki. And maybe should. Then it’s kind of compensatory.‘

C:         „I had the idea when you told me you had read my wiki.“

D:        „Do your children live with you?“

C:         „Yes. They both attend university. During the semester holidays, however, they travel a lot. They have been with Amara, my father’s sister, for the last two weeks. She had brought them back yesterday, as Monday the university starts again.“

D:        „I’m in Vancouver a lot for the next few weeks. There’s our film studio. I’ll probably only be at home on the weekends.“

C:         „That’s fine, Dean. If you really want to see me again, I’ll keep the weekends free for you.“

D:        „Ok, Cas. See you on Wednesday. I have to get out tomorrow morning. Bye.“

C:         „Until Wednesday, Dean. Sleep well. Bye.“

Cas didn’t let any time pass and looked at Dean’s wiki.

Dean Winchester

Dean Winchester (b. Dean Glen Winchester) was born on March 1, 1978  in  Dallas, Texas.  

Graduation from high school in 1996

 Since the second half of the 1980s he has been working as a child model.

Since 1997 he has been involved as an actor. He has been in a relationship with Lisa Braeden since 1998, and his son Ben was born in 2000.

The couple separated in 2007. Ben grows up with his mother.

 An affair with actress Lydia Canne in 2008 gave birth to daughter Emma, who was born in 2009, fatalities in 2012.

Dean Winchester has also been trying his hand as a singer since 2018.

Filmography:

1. Viva Wishbone (1995)
2. 1996: Mr. Rhodes
3. All Along the Water Tower (1997)
4. Days ofOur Lives (1998)
5. 1999: Such a disgrace
6. 2000: Blonde
7. 2001: Dark Angel
8. 2002:  Dawson’s Creek
9. The Plight of Clownana (2003)
10. 2004:  Smallville
11. Devour (2005)

• 2005 – 2020: Supernatural (2010 – 2019 also as director)
• Ten Inch Hero (2007)
• My Bloody Valentine 3D (2009)

He had a lot to digest. Dean had worked with Amara and Megan, which Cas didn’t know. Dean, like himself, had some affairs, some hopefully only on wiki. Wiki wasn’t that accurate. But Dean has apparently never been married once.

-8-

From Monday to Wednesday, Dean spent the days on set in Vancouver and the evenings in his apartment there with Benny and Crowley.

Whenever he went to bed in the evening, Dean thought of Castiel. He then picked up his phone and surfed the internet. He then stared at the pictures for hours and tried to realize whether he wanted to do anything with Cas, whether he wanted to do anything with a man at all. And as if to order, the mobile phone beep every evening at the same time and left “Good Night’s” with a picture.

Wednesday after lunch, the ‚Purgatory‘ team headed to Kansas for a book reading with author Chuck Shurley. The flight was delayed, so a stopover at the hotel or for Dean at home was no option. The limousines drove directly from the airport to the bookstore. The closer they got to the store, the more excited Dean became. They arrived a quarter of an hour before the event began.

At the door to the bookshop, Sam was already waiting for him. „But it will be time!“

„I’m sorry. I wrote to you that the flight was delayed.“ Dean hugged his brother. Sam accompanied his brother to the bookstore. They were greeted by a thunderstorm of lightning. He let his gaze wander through the room.

„Are you looking for someone specific?“ Benny asked him, who stood next to him. Both smiled at the photographers. „No, it’s good,“ Dean quipped. Crowley joined them. „Well, have you seen the author?“ he asked.

Benny and Dean shook their heads. „No, you?“ Crowley denied. He pointed to the other side of the room. „But an old flame. I’ll say ‚Hello‘.“ With that, Crowley was gone again. Megan pushed past them. „Boys, don’t stop in the middle of the entrance!“

Then he saw him, Castiel. Dean had to smile automatically. Castiel spotted him at the same moment and smiled back. Both nodded. Megan looked Dean in the face. „Is there something going on?“ Dean blushed. „Please what?“ Megan pointed to Castiel. Dean shook his head. „No, I think Crowley would have said something. He thought it was an old flame.“ Megan smiled knowingly. „I actually meant you, cowboy! But it doesn’t matter now.“

The three actors and Sam went to their seats under lightning storms. On the way there, Chuck Shurley, accompanied by Gabriel met them. „Gentlemen, I look forward to a good cooperation!“ He shook the hand of each of them. „Please sit down. We’ll start right away.‘ Gabriel winked at Dean.

Benny, Megan, Sam, Gabriel and Dean sat in the front row. Chuck sat down in an armchair that stood on a kind of pedestal from where every spectator could see him. He greeted his guests. Then he introduced the individual actors to the audience.

„The main role of Dante is played by Dean Winchester.“ Dean rose and turned to the audience. „The two companions Virgil and Statius are played by Benny Lafitte as Virgil and Crowley McLeod as Statius.“ Benny got up, Crowley came over to them and stood up. „You will probably have noticed the parallels with Dante’s Divine Comedy. The book „Purgatory“ is based on this. But it’s an absolutely independent novel.”

Chuck Shurley took a rhetorical break before introducing more. „The role of Beatrice will be taken over by Megan Masters, which I am very much looking forward to. We’ve already worked together.“ Applause erupted when the actress got up.

Chuck began to read from his book. Dean already knew the story, but it was a completely different experience when the author read it out himself.

Dean looked stealthily in Cas’s direction, who, thanks to the photographers, was now sitting right next to him. Cas listened smiling to the story. He, too, tried to catch a glimpse of Dean every now and then. When Chuck read out the place where Dante freed his wife Beatrice from purgatory, her eyes met. Dean immediately had a tingling sensation in his stomach. He felt his cheeks were running red. He lowered his gaze. Castiel carefully touched Dean’s forearm. Megan, who was sitting on the other side, rattled. Dean looked at her. She put her hand on his other forearm. Dean sculpted his lips with a „Why? Stop it!“ and she pulled her hand back. But Dean quickly realized what Megan was aiming for. The photographers were still waiting for a sensational image. Castiel also withdrew his hand.

When Chuck Shurley finished the reading, applause erupted. Everyone rose from their chairs and applauded. Dean liked the novel very much and obviously also to those present. The chairs have been regrouped. A question-and-answer session for journalists has been announced.

<> 

The Q&A panel itself took another hour. Afterwards, the photographers had time to take some photos. Then the journalists were bid farewell. Only the photographers who belonged to the publisher or the TV station were allowed to stay. Chuck Shurley invited to the champagne reception.

Everyone was talking to everyone. Castiel took the opportunity to have an animated conversation with Benny Lafitte. Dean spoke to Megan because they hadn’t worked together for a while.  On the flight from Vancouver, they didn’t have the opportunity to talk.

In between, Castiel and Dean cast themselves stealthy glances. When their eyes met, they smiled.

However, as there were always other interlocutors, they did not have the opportunity to have a conversation together.  The evening was gradually coming to an end.

Chuck finished the event well after midnight. He thanked everyone for their appearance. Gradually, the guests left the bookshop. The actors‘ limousines gradually drove to the hotel. Dean stayed until the end because he wanted to go home.

As the owner of the bookstore, Castiel personally said goodbye to each remaining guest at the door. When it was Dean’s turn, he said to Castiel, „I’m waiting for you outside,“ and just walked past Castiel. It would take another half an hour for Castiel to say goodbye to the last guest and close the shop.

Dean leaned outside the shop window and waited patiently for Castiel. „It’s a pity that we were so busy tonight and didn’t have time for a face-to-face conversation,“ Castiel began. „That’s what I was waiting for. I wanted to ask if you want to come with me. Then we can have a little chat,“ Dean said.

Castiel seemed to think, but then nodded. „Pleasure. Don’t care? I mean, you’ll definitely be flying back very early tomorrow.‘

Dean laughed. „Then I wouldn’t have offered it to you.“ He pushed Castiel in front of him. „It’s only a five-minute walk! So let’s go!“

-9-

Dean stopped in front of a beautiful villa. It wasn’t tall, but it looked very elegant. He unlocked and asked Castiel in. Castiel made big eyes. „Wow!“ Dean smiled. „Feel at home! Can I offer you a coffee?“ He pointed toward the living room. „Sit down, I’ll come after you!“

Castiel took off his coat and shoes and looked around. Dean noticed the looking gaze. „Wall cabinet right, left door. There are handles and slippers.“ Meanwhile, he continued to run into the kitchen. His kitchen had a passage way to the living room, so Dean could see Castiel sitting on the couch. He smiled.

After about five minutes, Dean arrived with a jug of coffee, two cups and a warmer. „Dean! Say something! I could have helped you carry it.“ He took the warmer out of Dean’s hand and put it on the table.

„Right pocket, matches,“ Dean said. Castiel approached him more closely. Without thinking, he put his hand in Dean’s pocket and searched for the matches. But before he found the matches, his fingers touched something else, very, very hard. He paused in the movement and looked Dean in the face. Dean immediately turned red and moaned between bitten teeth. „Cas, please. The matches! The coffee is hot. The jug slips away.“

„Oh yes. Sorry.“ Cas continued searching and found the small box. He took the matches out of his pocket, took one out and lit the tea light in the stump. He simply dropped the box on the table. Dean dropped the coffee and the two cups. He turned to Cas. Both were now upright against each other. Dean took Cas’s face into both hands and pulled him closer.

He pressed a stormy kiss on his lips. One hand wandered into Cass’s neck, the other was left lying on Cass’s chest. He felt the rapid heartbeat of his counterpart. Cas put his hands on Dean’s back, pulling him into an intimate embrace. He answered the kiss with equal passion.

When they interrupted the kiss to get some air, Dean took a small step backwards. „That’s not going to be the case with talking!“ He turned around and ran towards the kitchen. He was still breathing heavily when he came back. He waved a milk bag and a sugar can. Between his teeth he carried two small spoons. Castiel took the spoons from him.

„Milk and sugar?“ asked Dean. „Only milk please,“ Castiel replied. Dean then brought the sugar back into the kitchen. He returned with three bags of chips. „Which one?“ He held her in front of Castiel. Cas opted for the peanut flips. Dean threw the other two bags on the table. He immediately opened the flips and gave them to Castiel.

Castiel took the bag and sat on the couch. „And you really don’t mind?“ he quished. Dean shook his head. He took a deep breath.

„Cas, I asked you on the phone to give me time. And I really need that. Every time I’m near you, I have a tingling sensation in my stomach. I want to be close to you, touch you, kiss you. And I want so much more. But I don’t know what, I don’t know how. I want to approach it slowly, to familiarize myself with you and the situation. You are my first man, my first time, so to speak. I am not sure where this will lead. I don’t know where it’s going to lead, can, should, will. I can’t tell you what kind of relationship we have, if and how. And when it comes to relationships, I’m a burnt kid. I have trouble trusting others and to have a partner by my side. I love my work and have little time. I can’t offer you a regular life even if I wanted to. I travel a lot and am rarely at home. And I always have photographers by my neck. My privacy is limited. I can’t make promises to you. I can’t and won’t offer you a relationship at the moment. The only thing I can give you at the moment, what I’m willing to give is honesty.“ Dean exhaled. He felt liberated.

He poured coffee and milk in both. Then he turned back to Cas to give him his cup. Cas had reddened cheeks when he picked up the coffee cup.

„Dean, that’s so much more than I expected. I wasn’t even sure if you wanted to see me again. Now I know that this will not be our last evening together today. I don’t ask for more. Of course, I give you as much time as you want, as you need, which I also need. I can only tell you that I really enjoyed the three days last weekend and really missed you in the last three days. This is also new to me. In your presence, I feel like a teenager again. I have butterflies in my stomach, I want to talk to you, spend time, write, make phone calls. I want to touch you, everywhere. I dream of you, of tender touches, of sex. When you’re near me, my head turns off completely. I just want to be close to you, breathe in your scent, feel your warmth…“

Cas didn’t get any further. Dean had already emptied and put away his coffee cup and now cased Cas the cup and the chips out of his hands and put them on the table. He slipped closer on the couch, leaned forward and kissed him, first tenderly, then demanding. Cas leaned in and answered the kiss passionately, opened his lips to Dean, welcomed his tongue, and fought with him for supremacy. Dean interrupted the kiss and leaned back. He looked at Cas’s face. „Oh God, I want so much more, Cas. Show it to me, please.“

Cas breathed heavily. „Do you really want that?“

„Yes.“

>> Behind closed doors <<

>> after <<

Then he turned and walked ahead towards the bathroom. „Wow.“ He heard behind him. “Your tattoos are actually surpassed by your butt.” Cas gasped.

Dean laughed. In the bathroom he tossed the shirt in the laundry basket. He turned on the water in the shower and stood under it. „Come on Cas, soap me up!“ He lured the other into the shower. Cas stood next to him under the water jet. He took the shower bath from the niche and soaped Dean’s back. Tenderly, he stroked the spine, the shoulder blades, every single muscle strand that moved under his touch. Dean propped himself up against the wall. „Oh God, Cas, soap, do not make it hot!“ He turned around. „Just look what you’ve done!“ Dean was hard again. Cas smiled shamelessly. „I’m sorry.“ Dean laughed. „Should I believe you?“ Cas tilted his head to the side and jingled his eyes. Dean shook his head laughing. „Now it’s my turn. Turn around! “Cas shook his head. „No, no, that’s okay.“ Dean frowned. „Now don’t be so shy! turn around! “Castiel turned around timidly. Dean stayed out of breath. „Cas …“

„The tattoo is beautiful!“ He tenderly brushed it.

„Let’s go to bed. I’m cold and I’m tired,“ Dean said cautiously. Cas nodded. „A good idea.“ Dean showed Cas his bedroom. „So you sleep and dream here?“ Cas was impressed. A huge king-size bed stood on the opposite wall and filled half the room. Dean took Cas with him. He pulled him into a firm embrace. „My angel!“ He threw Cas on the bed. He lay down next to him and covered them both with a cuddly blanket. He cuddled cas, put his head on Cass’s chest and his arm around him. He had fallen asleep in seconds.

Agnes